In today’s era, where the mottos are “I come first” and “do what makes you feel good” (at any cost), a closed society has emerged in which everyone wants everything immediately and at all costs, and everyone wants to get rid of everything that doesn’t make them happy as soon as possible.
Sadly, this mindset has made its way into marriages, which has resulted in the creation of some clichés. Divorce affects about half of all marriages, proving that partners are now seen as disposable goods. True love is a choice, not an emotion, yet we keep looking for novel feelings like a wave of excitement or butterflies in our stomach instead.
Theologian John said, “I believe that most couples who have been married for 50 or 60 years fall in love and fall in love with each other several times. I say that without any intention of being funny. In my opinion, it’s almost crazy to think that people are “in love” equally throughout the years of marriage, and in the same way they were at the beginning of the relationship. It’s really crazy.”
Similarly, a blogger decided to show the reality of marriage after being asked if he was unhappy with the “monotony of everyday life” after being married to his wife for 10 years. His words of wisdom about “growing together and finding new reasons to keep falling in love with each other” have stuck in the minds of spouses around the world. He wrote the following:
“We’ve been together almost 10 years now. Yesterday I got a message asking if I felt unhappy with the monotony of everyday life in a longstanding relationship. If my wife has gotten a bit boring over time and how I’ve adapted to that or if I’m still expecting more from her. You know… to be more exciting or fun loving ….
Well here’s the thing…
After ten years a lot of our days can feel the same. They’re easily lost in the weeks into the months into the years. But that doesn’t mean they’re monotonous. It just means we have a lot of shit going on right now. She doesn’t jump my bones at any chance she gets; and she’s not exactly the promiscuous 18 year old that once wooed me at a party. But that doesn’t make her boring. It just means we’ve got responsibilities that are a little more on her mind right now. And yes, she can be a little more tired and snappy nowadays. But that doesn’t mean she’s not still the fun-loving chick I once dated. It just means there’s plenty of shit going on that she might be stressed about. You can’t expect things to never change in a relationship. Because they do. As time goes on shit becomes a little less fairytale and a little more life. If she’s stressed, try to take more of the load from her. If she’s tired, let her rest. If she’s anxious, tell her she’s doing a great job and if she’s insecure, tell her you love her more than you ever did.
It’s not about falling in love once and riding that out until the end of your days. It’s not about judging them against who they used to be. It’s about growing together and finding new reasons to fall in love all over again. But one thing’s for sure… don’t for one second think it’s all on her to make things better or more exciting. You can’t expect her to act like a princess if she’s treated like a slave. Let her know you’re in it together. It’s up to both of us to keep the spark going! I think she’s all right.